Anchoring Yourself in the Real World While Living in Your Story World

Anchoring Yourself in the Real World While Living in Your Story World

Missy Tippens

Writers are weird. Face it, we’re a unique breed. We hear voices and make up stories and create worlds and torture characters to make them grow. We stare at a computer for hours on end, talk to people who aren’t there, draw strange-looking charts. We laugh and cry (sometimes manically) while we type. We yell at our computer screen, yell at ourselves, and maybe even yell at some poor, unsuspecting soul who interrupts up at a critical moment (but then apologize profusely, of course). We own towering stacks of books that can almost take over a house, buy pens in every color, and collect sticky notes in every shape and size.

See, we sound weird, don’t we? :)

Yes, we often live in our story world. And that’s the way it needs to be while we’re putting down that first draft or doing the initial planning for a story. But we need to be able to change gears back to real life when it’s time. It can be tough to learn to do when we work at home. I think it's especially difficult yet important at holiday times when more of our family members are around...more of the time.

I took an amazing online class with Shirley Jump in November. And I used her class to plan a new plot for a proposal that hadn’t been up to par. I’ve been totally focused on that new proposal over the last few weeks. So focused that I let lots of other things go (like Christmas shopping!). I just sent the work out for critique late last week and felt like I had come out from under a rock once I sent it. My kids had been getting on me for being so distracted, especially once they were out of school for the Christmas holiday. And I admit I came away from the writing in a sort of panic that I’d never get everything done by Christmas.

So how do we anchor ourselves in the real world while submersing ourselves in the story world? Balance. I need to learn balance. Here are just a few thoughts on how to try to do that better.

--Turn off/shut the computer at a certain time each day and stick to that!

--Work at your most productive times of day if possible.

--Set priorities and, if needed, let some things go.

--Don’t get sucked into time on the Internet. Set limits and maybe even a timer.

--Budget time as well as money. Set aside time for each activity.

I know those suggestions are fairly vague. Maybe for the new year, I’ll try to figure out a plan to do better and post on that sometime later. But since I imagine I’m not the only writer out there who struggles with this (did you have a December deadline or some other project you’ve been working on that you needed to finish in December?), I thought I’d offer my solution for catching up.

So what do I do when I come out of my cave to find Christmas won’t wait?

I buy gifts that reach out and help others. And buy them in honor of my friends and loved ones.

Don’t buy your dad a tie he doesn’t need or your sister a pair of house slippers just like last year. Check with your favorite charitable organizations and see what gifting opportunities they offer. Today, I’ll share a few of my favorites and some that a couple of the Seeker ladies told me they use.

Myra Johnson and I both love the options with World Vision. Last year, I sent soccer balls to Africa in honor of my nephew, Buster Posey, who plays for the San Francisco Giants (I mean, what on earth can I buy the guy who could buy just about anything he wants??). I also contributed to maternal health in Afghanistan in honor of his wife. I’ve bought backpacks/school supplies for children in third world countries in honor of my dad (who grew up very poor, one of the youngest in a family of 12 kids, so I knew that would mean a lot to him).

Myra says, “I just made donations to World Vision in honor of my agent and our daughters and sons-in-law. World Vision has many different areas where your gifts can go, including animals, clean water, education, girls & women, and so many more! You can request a printed card or an e-card to be sent to your honoree, or you can print your own card. I enjoy selecting a gift that would have special meaning to the person I'm honoring."

To check out the World Vision catalogue, click here: World Vision

Myra says she has also given through Heifer International many times. And I believe I remember Ruthy saying the same thing. With this organization, you can give an animal or a share of an animal to help people around the world learn to be self-reliant. It can help them with income and food production.

To check out Heifer International, click here.

Tired of buying the same teacher gifts (for church and school teachers)? Years ago, we began giving to the United Methodist Children’s Home in honor the all my kids’ many teachers. They always seemed to appreciate it. And I even got one sweet thank you note that said the teacher’s father had grown up in a U.M. Children’s home (a different one). I’ve also donated here in honor of my editor, agent, close friends, our church and family members.

To check out the United Methodist Children’s Home in Decatur, Georgia, click here.

Julie Lessman shared she donates clean drinking water in honor of her publisher and agent. She told me that her church is part sponsor/creator of a wonderful Christmas program called Advent Conspiracy, where the whole concept is to give "presence" instead of "presents," so the four components are: Worship Fully, Spend Less, Give More, Love All. All money goes to digging wells for people in third-world countries who do not have clean drinking water.

To check out the Advent Conspiracy website, click here.  

Each year at our church, the Missions Committee sells items made by workers from around the world to help provide them income. They also offer a chance to buy gifts in honor, and the money goes toward local missions. They then send a beautiful handmade ornament to the recipients of the honor. The money raised for these go to The Light (local homeless shelter), Peace Place (shelter for battered women and their children), Habitat for Humanity, the Murphy-Harpst Home (residential center for abused children), The Tree House (to reduce the impact and occurrence of child abuse) and the Boy’s and Girl’s Club. Another that’s not actually local but is a mission our church supports is Life for Children Ministries, (supporting AIDS orphans in Kenya). I made use of all these this year! Most of my family members are getting these gifts. :)

My son on one of his Africa mission trips

One thing to keep in mind since today is December 19: These are great for last minute gifts. Most will let you print a gift card to present to your recipient. And most will also email or snail mail acknowledgments.

To follow up on the Ruthy’s offer a week or so ago when she challenged us to ring the Salvation Army bell, I’m going to offer a hot off the presses copy of A House Full of Hope (now available for pre-order!) to one commenter who makes a donation in honor of someone. To enter, go make a donation to one of these organizations or to the organization of your choice, and then let me know in your comment. If you’ve already done so recently as a Christmas gift, then let me know that and you’ll be entered. This is on the honor system here. I’ll believe you. No need to send a receipt. :) I’ll put all the names in a hat (well, I’ll actually use the cool online number randomizer) to pick one winner.

This turned into a long post. Bless you for making it this far!! We’d love to hear about your favorite charity or organization you volunteer for! (Okay, Grammar Queen, I know I ended in a preposition. But come one, who would say, "We'd love to hear about your favorite charity or organization for which you volunteer.")  ;)

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A House Full of Hope (from Love Inspired Feb. 2012)

A widowed mom of four finds hope of love in the most unlikely of places when the former bad boy who ruined her sister returns to town seeking redemption.

From Black Sheep to Father of Four…

Before becoming a Christian, Mark Ryker ran with a bad crowd and broke hearts. Including his father’s. Now a successful businessman, Mark has come home to Corinthia, Georgia, to make amends. But no one  will forgive him. So when the widowed mother of four renting his dad’s run-down house needs help fixing up the place, Mark gets to work. Pretty Hannah Hughes and her sweet kids have him longing to be part of the clan, but Hannah isn’t ready to let go of the past. Still, they are  working together on a house full of hope—and that’s all Mark needs.

Guest Blogger Jacqui Jacoby: Forward Motion

Forward motion makes the world go round in a very real, astronomical way. All that gravity and stuff...spinning planets, etc. It’s not something we really think of as we sit down to our computer to open our Facebook, check Twitters, open the day planner and then, finally, open that file we either love or hate, depending on the day of the week.
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Forward motion creates and maintains a writer’s career, it writes the books in that file. It moves us in the right direction every time we start to type.
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If you are a writer just starting out, that new cursor blinking at you, waiting for you to type, the first words can be scary. You have that whole novel in front of you and do not know what to expect. .
If you are close to finishing your first story, then you have entered it in a few contests. You are awaiting the results, hoping for the agent or editor to say you did this right.
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If you have finished that first book, won that contest, the book is now polished, ready to be submitted for representation.
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Once you get representation, you wait for that first contract.
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You get that first contact and then you wait for the second.
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Then the five book deal...

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...it does not matter how many steps you take in your writing; there are more to go. If you attend a conference and you go to the luncheon, there will be someone sitting to your right at the table who is four steps behind you, looking to you for support and encouragement. They will think wherever you are is where they wish they could be. To your left is a person four steps ahead. You will want to ask them questions about their journey.
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Because all of us have a journey. All of us have a place to go as well as a place we have been. The secret to surviving and thriving is learning to juggle the two with equality. I learned from some of the best: Dean Kootnz, Suzanne Brockmann, Nora Roberts. There is a talent to “arriving” in our job, to selling that book, that article, that--whatever. You will be excited, but you have to, as they did, keep a level of humility that makes it possible to turn to that person four steps behind and ask “what can I do for you?"

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You have paid your dues, now is time to teach some of what you know to the next generation coming up behind. .
I got an e-mail just this week telling me I was famous.
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I, of course, had to print this out and save it just so I could jokingly show my kids and prove to them that yes, I really do things at the computer besides update my blog and look at YouTube clips, that there is more in the package than “Mere Mom.”
But the e-mail made me pause. Made me wonder. Why? Why would someone say that? It was flattering, of course, and I don’t report it just so everyone realizes it happened. I say it because...don’t all of us deserve that e-mail? Haven’t all of us done something to deserve that message?
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Fame has never been a big deal with me. Either obtaining it or sitting across from it or sending it a letter. Whether a person is just starting out or already arrived, my tone of voice, my familiarity with the person I am speaking to, it will always be the same. I can think of at least two people high up on the fame food chain who would probably wish I was more reserved and less friendly and I can promise them, I am working on it--it’s just--well--besides the fact they are fun to talk to? I can blame it on Clive Cussler in one of the lessons he taught me when I sat with him in a bookstore, just the two of us: you have to keep looking back, remembering that you were once at the beginning, too. Remembering that is the only way you will ever move forward with class. His candor, his friendliness, passed off to me? I hope I have what he has and I can pass it on, too.
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Sitting down to write a book has got to be one of the most dedicated, mind numbing professions on the planet. We are creating real worlds with real people who otherwise would never be heard and that is an amazing feat.
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But every step we take in our career, from that first blinking cursor to the day we hit send on the copy we are submitting, to a book on a shelf, it is all about forward motion. Every time we type--forward motion. Everything thing we do in this job, in our lives, each and every day--forward motion.
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The trick, the balancing act, is to continue that forward motion on a daily basis, while looking over our shoulder at our past and remembering that even the people behind us, they are on the forward motion journey, too, and we can reach back and lend them a hand, making our forward motion even more amazing.
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Enjoy the trip because the experience is as good as the reward.
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Share with us today where YOU are in this “forward motion” – and what you are offering those coming along behind you.
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If you’d like to be entered in a drawing to win a “Gone With The Wind” Barnes & Noble book bag, leave your mail addy with your comment (remembering “at” and “dot”).
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Award winning author and 2009 Golden Heart Finalist, Jacqui Jacoby lives and writes in the mountains of Northern Arizona. She is a working mom whose career includes writing books, penning short non-fiction and teaching online and live courses. Jacqui can be reached via her website at http://www.jacquijacoby.com/.

Giving--the Secret to Success

Only ten days until Christmas Eve! Giving is such a big part of the celebration of Jesus’ birth. Some would say too big. You may agree, especially if you’re like me and don’t have your shopping finished. LOL But Christmas began with a gift. The Gift. God gave His only Son. So it’s only natural that we show our love with gifts, both the wrapped kind and less tangible variety involving our talent and time.

The best part—giving isn’t just appropriate at Christmas. In fact I believe giving may be the secret to success.

As writers, we have our individual goals. How will we achieve them? What sacrifices will we make? What efforts to grow and learn will we take? What agonies will we overcome? Every single one!

Why?

We have something to give. The goal isn’t just getting. Getting that manuscript published, getting money and recognition, getting on the New York Bestseller list. Though we might be working our butts off to get there, let’s face it, we can’t control whether we get our goals.

But we can control giving. I'd like to suggest the following ways we can give that will make this world a better place and just might bring us success.

Giving ourselves to God. Putting Him first. Building a relationship with Him. Using our time and talent for Him.

Giving our undivided attention to others. Not pretending to listen while we plot or write, but living in the moment, sharing ourselves. Glynna talked about Living Intentionally in her November 25 Seekerville post. It's well worth a second read.

Giving to ourselves. Holing up to write is essential. After all books don't write themselves. But we need exercise, healthy food, rest, spiritual food, fun. Make time for you. If you don't re-charge your batteries, you won't have anything left to give.

Giving to others. Using our time and talent to help others along the way. We can help other writers by mentoring, judging contests, critiquing or something as simple as a word of encouragement.

Giving our innermost selves to our craft. Pouring our hearts onto the page is hard, but when we do, we will give our readers a story that lifts, heals, strengthens and entertains. A lofty goal, it’s worth every ounce of our blood, sweat and tears. Let’s not be stingy by holding back.

Giving ourselves a chance to succeed. Dream big. Set goals. And work hard to achieve them. Don't waste the talent God gave.

I believe Winston Churchill said, “We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give.”

Sounds like give is spelled L-O-V-E

In keeping with the theme, I’m giving away a copy of my February release The Substitute Bride.
Fleeing an arranged marriage, debutante Elizabeth Manning exchanges places with a mail-order bride bound for New Harmony, Iowa. Life on the frontier can’t be worse than forced wedlock to pay her father’s gambling debts. But Ted Logan’s rustic lifestyle and rambunctious children prove to be more of a challenge than Elizabeth expects. She doesn’t know how to be a mother or a wife. She doesn’t even know how to tell Ted the truth about her past—especially as her feelings for him grow. Little does she know, Ted’s hiding secrets of his own, and when their pasts collide, there’s more than one heart at stake.

Leave a comment to enter the drawing. Perhaps you’d like to share how someone has helped you or some strategies prioritizing your life so you have time to give.

And speaking of giving, I can’t tell you what it means to me to come to Seekerville and find familiar faces, our dear friends and followers. Thank you for taking the time to come and to share your thoughts and yes, even your cyber goodies. You bless the Seekers each and every day!

Wishing you a very Merry Christmas!

Janet