Writing through the Reality of Life

with guests Lenora Worth and Terri Reed.

Hi, we’re so glad to be here to share the excitement as Seekerville begins their eleventh year. We don’t want to put a damper on things, but … when was the last time you stopped to take care of your writer’s soul?

Been a while? Well, stick around because we know a lot about this subject since we both just finished a grueling project involving several writers. While we were busy brainstorming and plotting, it seemed as if life was plotting against us. Anything that could go wrong in our personal lives did go wrong. 

Writer stress messes with both our physical bodies and our heads. Everything from writer’s block and depression, family issues, and physical ailments, can bring our fast-paced rush to get that book done to a slamming halt. When we try to push through without stopping to take care of ourselves, we can sometimes make things worse.

Writers have the need to produce good stories. This brings a different kind of stress, because we think too much. We process, analyze, dissect, put back together and come up with ten ways to worry over a sentence.

When you add life plus deadlines plus health issues plus family issues, well, that’s writer’s stress. Soon, you’re sitting in your office staring out the window. You’ve forgotten how to write and you just can’t form the words.

Here are some suggestions we’ve compiled over the years on how to take care of the writerly you.

1. Set realistic expectations. Don’t try to prove you can do it all. You’ll make yourself sick trying. It’s okay to hold up a white flag and surrender sometimes. Set little achievable goals that work toward the bigger goal. It’s easier to build a house one brick at a time than trying to lay all the bricks at once.

2. Our worst fears stem from not measuring up. We judge ourselves and feel like failures if we can’t do it all. This is a vicious pattern. Give yourself grace the way God does. He knows you inside and out and loves you. Self-love is not self-centeredness. It’s okay to be okay with yourself. You’re enough.

3. Stress is not about everything that’s happening in your life—it’s about how you react to everything that’s happening in your life. When you find yourself in a tight situation, don’t look around. Look inside and to God then decide what’s best for you. He will guide you. Sometimes His answer is to step back and let go of anything unnecessary that is contributing to your stress.

4. Don’t go borrowing trouble. Publishers shut down, editors get shifted around, and e-publishing and print books are trying to cope with each other. This industry is too big for one writer to worry over! Stay informed, yes. Ask questions, yes. Absorb facts, but don’t take on worries about things you can’t control. You only have two shoulders! (Stretch those shoulders every few minutes.)

5. Learn to take things slow. Hard to do in such a fast-paced I-need-it-now world. Or as Judy Christie says in her book “Hurry Less, Worry Less at Work” learn to take the “deadly” out of deadlines. Put some wiggle room in deadlines and in your blue jeans. 🙂

Because your waistline can increase right along with your deadline worries, right? So take time before you head to your writing so you can focus. Let that guilt go and take a walk or kiss your honey. Take a little time to do something that doesn’t involve work. Exercise your body as well as your mind. Even during deadline week!

6. Prayer plus Action equals a good reaction. Prayer or meditation can be very important in every aspect of our lives, but action can bring you peace of mind. Find a way to live with intention. Don’t let the writing own you. If your flame is fueled by what matters in life, your fire won’t go out when your career takes a wrong turn. Sometimes life’s bumps are part of God’s plan to grow and stretch you.

7. Take on only what strengthens you. Don’t say YES to all the right things for all the wrong reasons. You have to carve out a spot where work takes priority. Say NO to requests that don’t bring you joy. If you find writing draining at times, try to find a pace that allows it to become a joy again. Even in crisis mode, remember writing is your thing. It’s important. It’s your job. But taking time to heal or reset your joy button is even more important. Life crisis comes before a deadline, okay? A deadline can be extended. Your life? Not so much if you’re slowly taking away years due to too much anxiety.

8. Are you successful but stressed? Or are you successful in spite of stress? Are there times you want to stay in bed all day, hidden under the covers? Do you make yourself get up? Writing should be a joy even on days when it feels like a drain. But when you’re in crisis mode, it’s hard to be joyful. Start with one or two minutes of gratitude attitude. See if that can be extended a little each day until you’re back. 

9. Are you keeping up the act of a happy, successful person when you feel like a complete flop? Reach out to others. If you strip things down and spill your heart, you’ll become surrounded by the grace and the fellowship of people who understand. And you’ll find out they need to talk about such things, too. It’s not so much that misery loves company. But misery NEEDS company!

10. Learn to show poise under stress, grace under pressure and acceptance of yourself during hard times. Remember, it’s how we react to stressful situations that matters. It’s not easy but the next time you want to throw a hissy fit, go ahead and do it. Find a private place and rant. Get in the shower and cry. Then pick yourself up and take deep, calming breaths for several minutes. 

Breathe, really let go and breathe. Define stress as part of life, laugh in its ugly face. Put on some color and blow kisses into the wind. You can’t burn out if you know how to sparkle! 

Two good books on this subject are Judy Christie’s “Hurry Less, Worry Less at Work” and Allie Pleiter’s “How to Write When Everything Goes Wrong.”

Now we’d like to hear from you. Are you in a good place or a bad place? What have you done to get through a hard time?

Today, Lenora and Terri have brought a terrific prize package. Three commenters will take home books. One will take home Terri Reed's Guardian, another Lenora Worth's Tracker and a third will win Classified K9 Unit Christmas featuring novellas by both Terri and Lenora!!

Here's a sneak peek:

 Classified K-9 Unit Christmas

A Killer Christmas by Lenora Worth


When FBI K-9 agent Nina Atkins thwarts an attempted murder, she becomes a target of the killer—the same hit man US Marshal Thomas Grant is tracking. Even caught in the crosshairs, Nina’s reluctant to share her case, but working with Thomas may be the only way to capture a murderer before she becomes his next victim.

Yuletide Stalking by Terri Reed


Determined to stop an arsonist with the help of his accelerant-detecting K-9 partner, FBI agent Tim Ramsey must protect the only witness. But when the criminal begins stalking Vickie Petrov, can Tim convince her to trust him…and help her survive to see another Christmas?

Tracker 

MISSION: REUNITE MOTHER AND SON



Single mother Penny Potter has spent months in hiding to keep her toddler from his father, a rogue FBI agent turned fugitive. But he’s determined to flee the country with the child, and she can’t dodge him forever. When he corners Penny in the Montana wilderness and gets away with their son, she’s forced to trust his brother, handsome FBI K-9 agent Zeke Morrow. And Zeke must decide where his loyalty lies: with his sibling or the woman he wasn’t supposed to fall for. As the bullets fly and family ties are tested, Penny and Zeke will fight to save the boy who brought them together.

Guardian

PROTECTING THE SINGLE MOM 

When a fellow FBI agent is kidnapped and a protected witness vanishes, Leo Gallagher will stop at nothing to find them both. So when he discovers a link between the case and a single mother in Wyoming, Leo and his trusty K-9 partner rush to question Alicia Duncan. Could she be the key to locating the missing persons? Not if a killer has anything to say about it. Someone is determined to keep Alicia from talking, so Leo and his chocolate Lab must keep her and her little boy safe on their family ranch. With danger lurking around every corner, Leo must work overtime to not lose another person who's important to him.



Lenora Worth writes romance and romantic suspense for Love Inspired and also writes for Tule Publishing. Three of her books finaled in the ACFW Carol Awards and several have been RT Reviewer’s Choice finalists. She also received the RT Romance Pioneer Award for Inspirational Fiction. “Logan’s Child” won the 1998 Best Love Inspired for RT. She has made the NY Times, USA Today and Publishers Weekly bestseller lists. With seventy-five books published and millions in print, she enjoys adventures with her retired husband, Don. Lenora loves reading, baking and shopping … especially shoe shopping.

 Terri Reed’s romance and romantic suspense novels have appeared on Publisher’s Weekly top 25, Nielsen’s Bookscan top 100 and featured in USA Today, Christian Fiction Magazine and Romantic Times Magazine, finaled in RWA’s RITA contest, National Reader’s Choice Award contest, ACFW’s The Carol Award contest. Contact Terri @ www.terrireed.com or P.O. Box 19555 Portland, OR 97224m.

What NOT to Write: Get an "ELNORA-STYLE" Writing Makeover with Guest Blogger Lenora Worth!

Hello, darling Speedbo people. When I was asked to do this blog during Speedbo Week, I looked at it wrong and thought "Speedo." And I said, "Oh, no." I didn't want to wear a bathing suit to this blog party. 

But Ruthie explained what y'all are doing and of course, I thought of shoes. Only because I thought of what not to write and that lead to what not to wear and then back to what not to write. 

So I thought I'd go through a list of things you do and don't want in your manuscript. These are things you can go back and fix, of course, by adding in or taking out. So don't panic right now if you've just done it exactly the way I'm telling you not to do it. It will all be pretty by the end of your edits. Oh, I brought alone some strong Louisiana coffee and some rich chocolate. And of course, now that I'm living in Florida, some Key Lime Pie.

Sit and back and get ready for some fun makeover talk:

First, let's take a good long look at your story as is--How do you feel about it? If a friend read it right now, would she love it or would she call in the Speedbo Police right away? Is it too long, too short? Does it have enough goal, motivation and conflict to hold everything together? Always go over your first draft with a fine-toothed comb, because, darling, it will not be your last draft.  Your first draft is the skeleton for what will become a book. (Just like a new outfit involves layering and fluffing and ironing out some wrinkles.) Don't go with the first dress you try on.

Second, decide what you style will be--this is your voice. Serious and buttoned up like a Brooks Brother suit? Carefree and free-spirited like a Betsy Johnson jumpsuit? Humorous and colorful like a Wal-Mart nightgown? There are many different styles of telling the same story, right? Just like shoes, each story has something unique that only you as a writer can create. Learn from others, but don't try to be the next .......... somebody. Be the first YOU!

Third, Just like bell-bottoms 

and mullet haircuts, human nature will never change. 


Both of the afore mentioned styles are still around in one shape or another. Just go to any mall and watch the people--you'll spot something old and it's new again. In writing, that's called a new twist on an old plot. And any old or new plot involves human nature. Human nature never goes out of style but it does add an interesting component to life. And to our stories--use it, but make it fresh. And make it work, as Tim Gunn would say. Human Nature is like classic clothing. It's always there in the back of the closet but it might need a good cleaning and airing before you can throw it on and go out the door.

Fourth, think outside the box.


 If your story feels drab and dull (or if people are telling you it feels that way) you might want to be a bit more daring. Try something you wouldn't normally do. This doesn't mean if you're a t-shirt and jeans type writer, you decide to step out in a glitzy tub top and stilettos. But it does mean that you might need a trim or a tweak, some new color thrown in there, and a slightly higher heel--as in a slightly different twist.

 If you get feedback that says "this is too traditional" or "not enough conflict" or "this is not for us but we wish you well elsewhere" then you might need to try something different. You don't have to throw out your whole drawer of manuscripts, but you might want to give them all an updated style. You can learn to do this by reading current writers--especially those you admire. You're not copying; you're shopping for something stylish and up-to-date.

And fifth and finally, please remember Elnora's Number One Rule for What Not To Write. 

Don't forget the enchantment. In the fashion world, we'd call this bling. In the writing world, we call this the one extra accessory that makes your story shine. 

I've always believed in this rule but when I heard David O. Russell, the director of "The Silver-Lining Playbook" tell someone "Without enchantment, you can't get through the tough parts" it hit me that that's how I write. I always want to add that little bit of enchantment (but steeped in reality) to make the story shine brightly and grab the reader. This is not the Harry Potter kind of enchantment. It's all about Cinderella and the shoe that changed her life, but it's also about how a real-world Cinderella would be capable of wearing the pumps, pumping the gas, feeding the kids, nurturing her own soul through her faith and yes, feeding the forest animals while she cleans the house. Her prince will understand her, accept her flaws and will try to be a better man because he loves her. And she will do the same in return.

So there, my lovelies. Let's recap (while wearing our dashing berets). We don't want boring. We don't want average. We need style and flare and daring. We need something attention-getting but in a good way. And we need that little bit of style, voice, and real world charm to get the attention of an editor, an agent and hopefully, lots of readers. There is no magic wand for this. You really just need to look, listen, learn, practice and oh, yes, wear fabulous shoes! And carry a big notebook!

Lenora :)