Why Writers are Like Pirates with Guest Blogger Captain Jack Sparrow

Greetings, writers!

Many of you are aware that I am penning my story. Some consider it a piece of fiction, others call it a thrilling autobiographical peek into the life of the world famous (and handsome) pirate captain of the Black Pearl.



Either way, the fact is I don't spend all my time on Unpublished Island waiting to be rescued, my pistol with a single bullet at me side. No, at times sit, pen in hand (rum in the other) writing.  One thing I've learned since I began writing is that writing is a lot like pirating. You have your scallywags, your bloody pirates, your scoundrels and your traitors.


And then there are the rules. Ah, yes, the rules.



Pirates have rules : The Pirates Code.


 Known rules and guidelines of code from the Pirata Codex: (From the Pirates of the Caribbean Wiki)

• Rule one, befriend others wisely.
• The Right of Parlay
• Artycle II, Section I, Paragraph VIII (sharing of the spoils)
• Artycle II, Section II, Paragraph I (whoever first spotted a treasure-laden ship could choose the best pistol for themselves)
• Every crew member is to have an equal share in any treasure found 
• Any man who falls behind is left behind 
• An act of war and parley with adversaries may only be declared by the Pirate King, who could only be elected by popular vote by all nine Pirate Lords. 
• Any person who refuses to serve aboard a pirate's ship must die.
• Trading for products fair and square mean the seller can do as they like, including resell at profit.
• The Code also contains strict regulations on eye patch color and peg leg size  as well as implying that a pirate never gives another away.

"The Code is the law." -Edward Teague.

Writers Have Rules: The Writers List of Ten

1. Thou shalt show not tell.
2. Point of View may not be shifted in a paragraph
3. Avoid overuse of exclamation points!!!
4. No sentence fragments.
5. Don't use adverbs (especially LY adverbs)
6. Write actively not passively.
7. Eliminate dialogue tags.
8. Avoid over use of exposition, narrative and description.
9. Plot everything.
10. Always follow the rules.


Whilst the rules do bear merit and most of the time should be honored (like invoking the rule of parlay). There are times that it seems to me that rules can be a bit superfluous, thus made to be broken.  As Captain Barbossa puts it, "The Code is more what you call guidelines than actual rules."

In the end, remember this:



"The only two rules that  really matter are these:What a man can do. And what a man can't do."-Captain Jack Sparrow.

One caveat: No rule breaking until you master the rules. Savvy?

The Brethren Court

Writers and Pirates Have Token Organizations

Another thing I have discovered as I have steered my way into this writing world is there are several writing organizations, similar, I am told to the Brethen Court.  The Brethren Court being the formal organization  consisting of the nine Pirate Lords and their followers. Pirate Lords are of course elected officials who rule the pirate world.

A bit of trivia for you: I of course was the youngest pirate ever to become a Pirate Lord.

Reviews. Let's discuss reviews.

Pirates get them too you know.


"You are without doubt the worst pirate I have ever heard of." -Commodore Norrington.


"But you have heard of me."-Captain Jack Sparrow  (I love to quote myself.)

"That is without doubt the worst pirate I have ever seen."-Commodore Norrington. (Note: Scathing reviewers aren't usually very original.)

And sometimes the reviews contradict each other, don't they!


   "That's got to be the best pirate I've ever seen." -Captain Groves.

 Remember, sometimes a bad review can be just as effective in getting your name out there as a good review. Oh, and always consider the source, eh?

("Sticks and stones, Luv." -Captain Jack Sparrow.)

Writer Etiquette. 

This is not unlike pirate etiquette. I have included some lines you might find useful when dealing with an editor, agent, critique partner or perhaps you might find them particularly helpful at one of those writerly functions and/or soirees. Insert names as needed.

•   "I am disinclined to acquiesce to your request." Captain Barbossa.)

• "This is either madness or brilliance." (Will Turner.)

• "Abandon ship. Abandon ship." (Lt. Gillette.)

• "Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate." (Captain Jack Sparrow.)

• "No heroes amongst thieves." (Will Turner.)

•  "They'll be no living with her after this." (Captain Jack Sparrow)

• "If I may be so bold as to interject my professional opinion?" (Captain Jack Sparrow)

• "Drinks all around!" (Jack Sparrow)

• "We have an accord!" (Captain Barbossa)

•  "I think we've all arrived at a very special place. Spiritually, ecumenically, grammatically." (Captain Jack Sparrow)

Aye, but it's liberating to know you now have the perfect response for all those special situations courtesy of Captain Jack Sparrow.  I suggest writing them on index cards and keeping them close at conference.

 
That would be my bit of Captain Jack Sparrow wisdom for the day. Back to Speedbo, mates.

But first it's only fair I offer a wee bit of my treasure to my favorite writers.

Three treasures. Three winners. What is it you ask? Something even a pirate would covet. 


And it's a surprise.

 Just share your favorite Captain Jack Sparrow quote.




Hard to choose. I understand. But choose ye must!
 

I bid you...Adieu

Today is another day of our March Speedbo. Find out more about Speedbo and our exciting weekly prizes here. Comment today for a chance to win! Winners announced in the Weekend Edition.