What I learned about great chapter hooks from LOST

By MaryLu Tyndall

The final ten seconds of an episode of my favorite show, LOST, is playing on my widescreen TV (In HD!) and I’m already on the edge of my seat.

Why?

Because I know the writers ALWAYS end each show with something completely bizarre and jarring. And without fail I jump to my feet, clench my fists, and groan, to which my husband invariably says, “Why do you watch this if it frustrates you?” Why do I? Because I can never guess what they are going to do. I never see it coming and I LOVE it! My frustration stems from having to wait another week to find out what happens.

That’s how I want my readers to feel when they finish a chapter in my book. I want them to moan with frustration, gulp with surprise, sigh with enjoyment, and anxiously turn the page. So, how do we, as writers accomplish this in a novel? Is it too much to ask of ourselves to create at the end of each and every chapter the same tension we feel while watching a TV show like LOST? What if your story is a sweet romance or Amish story? Can you do the same thing? I’m here to say, Yes, you can!

Below is a list of types of chapter hooks I took from LOST episodes and beneath each one, I give an example of how I used it in my own writing. This is by no means an exhaustive list, and I welcome your ideas for additional endings. Also, please forgive me for only using my books. Problem is, I know my own writing so well and didn’t have time to sift through other author’s books.

Now remember, these are the final sentences in chapters. As you read them, and even without knowing the story, ask yourself if you would turn the page.

End with the worst thing possible that could happen to your character
(In this case, losing his father’s ship to a lady pirate!)
I thank you, Captain, for your chivalrous rescue.” The woman pointed her pistol at him and cocked it with a snap. “But I believe I’ll be taking over your ship.” (The Red Siren)

In a romance, have your heroine find the hero talking intimately to another woman or visa versa
Merrick sat at a table in the back, surrounded by a band of filthy pirates. His ebony hair hung to his shoulders, and his familiar baldric crossed his thick chest. On his lap sat a beautiful, dark-haired woman. He laughed then buried his face into her neck, kissing her.
Charlisse’s heart shattered and crumpled like sand to the floor. (The Reliance)

Play upon the character’s worst fears
Isabel bolted up in bed and glanced over the shadows in her room. Her eyes darted to the cradle beside her. It rocked back and forth. She peered inside. Her baby was gone. (The Restitution)

Create a moment of extreme embarrassment
Hope’s eyes widened. She flung a hand to her mouth, then bent double and lost the contents of her stomach all over his boots. (The Blue Enchantress)

Unexpected action
(The Raven Saint)
Rafe opened his mouth to tell the exasperating woman that God was on no one’s side, but her eyes fluttered shut, and she collapsed.

Have an unexpected or long lost character enter the room
(The Blue Enchantress)
(Background: A man has just entered the tavern where Hope is waiting. It is the man who sold her as a slave on St. Kitts.) His satin waistcoat and breeches bespoke either great wealth or ostentatious pride, and he perused the room with haughty disdain as if he owned the place.
Hope panted out a ragged breath. “Lord Falkland.”.

End with a threat
(The Raven Saint)
Rafe threw back his shoulders and lengthened his stance to cover up the fear tying his stomach into knots. He swung back to his father whose blue eyes glowed with cruel deception. “What is this about?”
His father grinned. “This is what I believe you call a mutiny.”

End with an action that could end badly
(Background: Hope is being sold as a slave to a slimy merchantman) (The Blue Enchantress)
As the man counted out the coins into the auctioneer’s greedy hands, Hope reached for the sword.

End with a promise of disaster.
(Surrender the Night)
A petal loosened and floated to the floor by her feet. When it struck the wooden planks, a heavy drape of foreboding fell upon her. Something terrible was about to happen. Something that would keep Alex from her forever.

End with a promise of action
(The Blue Enchantress)
Clenching his fists, Nathaniel resolved to speak with Hope tonight, for he could no longer deny his feelings. He must tell her he loved her.

End with violence
(The Falcon and the Sparrow)
She halted behind him, knees quaking. Her fingers gorged with blood. Gripping the candlestick with both hands, she hefted it as high as she could. Then, squeezing her eyes shut, she tensed her arms, readying herself to swing with all her might.

A daunting realization:
(The Raven Saint) Sometime in the middle of the night, a lurid thought seeped into Grace’s mind, jarring her consciousness. A picture of a ripe yellow mango danced through her mind. Lifting her hand to her throat, she gasped as tears of shame burned behind her eyes. I am a thief.

End with a question
(Surrender the Heart)
Footsteps stomped. Marianne held her breath.
A half circle of light advanced upon her shoes, then crept up her legs.
“What have we here?”

Ominous foreboding
(Surrender the Heart)
It was the only hope Noah could cling to as he swung over the bulwarks and dropped into the boat that would take him, his men, and Miss Denton to a fate worse than death.

End with a shocking statement
(The Falcon and the Sparrow)
Once she stepped over the threshold of this house, she would no longer be Dominique Dawson, the loyal daughter of a British Admiral. She would be a French Spy.

A vow
(The Red Siren)
Everything inside of her screamed in defiance. She would not serve a God who had allowed such suffering in her life.

An ultimatum
(The Red Siren)
“You will marry me.”
Yanking her hand from his, Faith retreated. “I will not.”
“Then I shall be forced to turn you in for piracy.

Okay, now it’s your turn. Let’s see what you got. Give me your best chapter hooks! They can either fit into one of these categories, or additional ones. (I’d love to have you add new ones to my list!) The Seekerville squad will choose a winner to receive a free copy of my new release, Surrender the Heart.

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MaryLu Tyndall is the queen of historical action adventure romances. A Christy Award finalist, she has just released the last in her Charlestown Bell series and a new set of romantic adventures, Surrender to Destiny, begins right now with Surrender the Heart.

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