“Why not me?” vs “It Could’ve/Should’ve Been Me!”

        “Why not me?” vs “It Could’ve/Should’ve Been Me!”

by Missy Tippens

Last week my daughter and I were watching videos on YouTube. She shared an amazing video of a group doing a Taylor Swift song. (I would share it, but it’s apparently been pulled.) The group was outstanding. The lead singer, in my opinion, was as good as Taylor (in her own way).

And a profound thought hit me:

Why not me?

Now before you picture me on stage with a microphone, that's not what I'm talking about. :) I started thinking about artists...which led me to think of writers. When both are talented, what’s the difference between that young woman in the video and Taylor? What's the difference between an unpublished writer and a published one? Maybe opportunity, persistence, “luck.” I don’t believe in luck,  but rather in God’s perfect timing. So maybe timing makes a difference. Maybe that young woman (or unpublished writer) will have her chance at later.

As I pondered what launches someone to success, I thought: BLOG IDEA!

Do we ask, “Why not me?” and then jump in to work hard on our writing, sending out submissions, trying new markets, taking risks? Or do we tend to let opportunities slip by and then wonder what could’ve happened? Do we get our noses bent out of join and think, “It could’ve been me.” Or worse, gripe with sour grapes and say, “It should’ve been me!”

I’m ashamed to say I’ve probably let opportunities slip by out of inaction or outright fear of acting.

For several months, as deadlines have allowed, I’ve worked on Saturday mornings on what I call my for-fun book. It’s a young adult story (I love reading YA and have done so for years!). When Tina Radcliffe started posting contest updates for contests that allowed published authors to enter as long as they’re not published in the category they enter, I got the urge to throw my YA out there. But I was terrified. I hem-hawed around and missed one contest deadline.

Then I decided to email my agent to see how she felt. Then, yet again, I chickened out on the next contest that came by.

...What if it’s really bad? And, OMGosh, my author name will be right there in writing on the entry form! Though judges won’t know who wrote the entry, someone could find out.

...What if they hate it and I get discouraged want to quit working on it, even though I feel God leading me to work on it?

...What if it finals, but then the editor sees it and hates it, ruining all future submissions to that editor?

And on and on…

All the excuses. All the irrational fears. Goodness, we’re writers, so we can get pretty creative in our worst case scenarios, can’t we?!

Another contest deadline approached. I needed to get a little of the “Why not me?” attitude. And I guess, in a way, God gave me the nudge I needed (as well as Tina reminding me of the contest again).

In a panic, I sent it off to my critique partners. They gave some great feedback on ways to polish. But neither of them read YA, which left me anxious. So I emailed Melanie Dickerson and Mary Connealy and begged them to take pity on me and read my first 15 pages. They were wonderful. Both read it asap and gave fantastic feedback on some changes that might help.

But best of all, they both said they loved it. It was the shot in the arm I needed. With their suggestions, I condensed the opening to fit more of the chapter in the entry. And, with shaking hands, I emailed that entry off. Now why hadn’t I done that sooner? Why had I missed two perfectly good opportunities?

Last week, as I watched the video with my daughter and saw that talented young woman sing her heart out, I decided I need a BIG DOSE of the “Why not me?” attitude. Instead of pursuing this writing career with hesitation and doubt, I want to learn to be fearless. I’m not talking stupidity here. I won’t mail off something before it’s ready. But I want to get rid of the self-doubt. Learn to get over rejection and failure quickly so I can move on and try again. (My One Word this year is Resilience.) Instead of cowering, I want to jump out there and say: Why not my YA?

Wow. What a mind blowing thought. :)

So what about you? What category do you fall into? Do you worry and figure good things aren’t ahead for you? Do you waste precious time and think thoughts like, “It should’ve been me!”?

Or do you jump in and work for all you’re worth thinking, “Why not me?”

UPDATE!!!!!! I just found out on Sunday that my YA entry tied for 3^rd place in the Gotcha! Contest!! The top 4 (well, 5 with the tie) will be sent to Natashya Wilson at Harlequin Teen for review. :)

Okay, I had a little squeal of excitement, there. Now back to the post…

I hope you’ll share what category you fall in, or how you plan to move to the “Why not me?” category. And if you’d like to be entered to win a copy of A House Full of Hope (to prepare for the next Corinthia, GA, book, Georgia Sweethearts, coming in April from Love Inspired!), then in the comments, PLEASE TELL ME TO ENTER YOU.

BTW, don't you love my new cover?!! Georgia Sweethearts is available for Pre-order!
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Visit Missy at www.missytippens.com