Of all the pieces of backstory we should understand as the author, none will have a greater impact on your story than the Emotional Wound. The reason for this is simple. In real life, the people and experiences from our past have made us who we are today—they have shaped us, in good ways and bad. It’s no different for our characters. Formative experiences from their past steer who they become, and no experience is more altering than a psychologically traumatic one.
These wounding experiences generate fear and pain, and unresolved, will embed pieces of festering shrapnel which will eat away at a character’s esteem and self-worth. The result is a character who holds back in life, adopts dysfunctional behavior as a shield, develops skewed biases about how the world works, and internalizes destructive false beliefs about her own self-worth.
Sounds like a recipe for a deeply unfulfilling life, doesn’t it? It is.
Until our character is ready to revisit this backstory wound, identify the problems and fears that are eroding her happiness, and adopt new attitudes that will help her move forward in a healthier way, the wound will continue to keep what she wants and needs most out of reach.
Are you thinking “character arc” right about now? You’re bang on! This scenario, taking a character from broken to whole, is known as the Change Arc. This is the most common type of arc and is all about transformation and growth. Full of ups and downs, it can be difficult to write, so let me share a blueprint to help. I’ve included hyperlinks for all the big working pieces, so if you haven’t read The Emotional Wound Thesaurus, they can help to show how everything fits.
THE JOURNEY OF LETTING GO
At the start of a story, the character is seeking to obtain her goal (outer motivation), which she may be pursuing to either avoid something undesirable or to satisfy a yearning (inner motivation). The pursuit of this objective is difficult or may seems impossible. There might be roadblocks in the way and people or forces standing against the character (outer conflict), but the unmet need continues to drive her toward her goal.
As the story progresses, she gradually gains small insights into the things that are holding her back (inner conflict), what she fears and why (the wound and the lie), and how her habits and biases (emotional shielding) are probably not helping her cope. With these baby steps of self-growth, she learns and matures, adapting to her current circumstances and achieving minor successes that increase her confidence. These successes may be akin to false positives, though, because she hasn’t fully rejected the fear and false beliefs that are causing her damage. Still fearful of emotional pain, a lot of her shielding remains in place. She also continues to embrace the lie; she doubts whether she really deserves the goal but is cautiously hopeful things will work out.
A point will come in the story when she hits an impasse or suffers a significant setback. This is her dark moment, where she hits rock bottom. She sees that she can’t win going forward as she has been—that if she wants her goal, she must examine her position honestly and take a closer look at some of her internal issues. This means she must confront her emotional pain and challenge the lie she believes.
Depending on the nature of the wounding event, gaining insight can be painful, but it has to be done. The character must eventually awaken to two things: first, she must see her wound in a new light, admitting that it has held her back and kept her from being happy and fulfilled. Second, she must view herself differently, in a kinder light, and believe she is worthy of something better and is deserving of happiness.
This self-awareness will change her view of herself, allowing her to replace her disempowering beliefs of unworthiness with empowering beliefs (that she is worthy, has value, and is capable of achieving change). This new, balanced perspective frees her from any feelings of blame, responsibility, or unworthiness she carries about the past, which shatters the lie and replaces it with the truth.
Refuting the lie and putting the wounding event into perspective enables her to forgive herself (if necessary) and be free of the fear that has steered her actions to date. It also changes her misconceptions about the world and how it operates. She is no longer held prisoner by fear; instead, she has hope and is infused with determination. Complete, centered, and embracing her true self, she does what is needed to achieve the goal, even if it means making personal sacrifices.
Moving past the wound will not remove her fears completely, but because she believes in herself, and she knows what she must do, she is able to embrace the challenges ahead. Despite the forces that stand between her and her goal, she is ready to move forward by shedding the negative qualities that are holding her back and either adopting new, positive traits or honing forgotten ones.
As she moves toward her goal, she may be tested by encountering a situation similar to the wounding event. This will trigger the same fear, but her newfound strength and belief in herself allows her to master it instead of being mastered by it. Once she successfully navigates this situation, she will gain her goal (provided you are writing a HEA).
These are stepping stones you can use to show your character’s own journey from incomplete and unfulfilled to satisfied and whole. Remember that wounds will never be forgotten. But once the character faces the past and sees it differently (and lets go of any lies or self-blame she may feel) she has an inner strength she lacked before. Moving forward, she will behave differently, deploying healthy coping strategies and harnessing positive qualities to stay centered and on the path to wholeness.
Do you write this type of Character Arc journey? It’s one we can all relate to as unfortunately emotional pain is not limited to fiction. Aren’t we all seeking ways to move forward and heal? A good reason to remember to be kind to ourselves, and to others.🙂
Leave a comment today and you could win a copy of The Emotional Wound Thesauraus. Angela is giving away two ecopies! Thank you, Angela. Winner announced in the Weekend Edition.
And Angela brings a special opportunity to Seekerville, you can watch a terrific Emotional Wounds Webinar for a discounted price and help a fellow writer. Details here.
Angela Ackerman is a writing coach,
international speaker, and co-author of the bestselling book, The Emotion Thesaurus, as well as five others
(including The
Emotional Wound Thesaurus). Her books are available in six
languages, are sourced by US universities, and are used by novelists,
screenwriters, editors, and psychologists around the world. Angela is also the
co-founder of the popular site Writers
Helping Writers,
as well as One Stop for Writers, an powerful online
library built to help writers elevate their storytelling. Find her on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.
Wow, Angela, the more I read, the more I learn! Thanks for this awesome post! I have the book already, no need to enter me. And, I'm using it!
ReplyDeleteAs I read, I can see the changes in my character are following your guidelines to a tee. Yay for me!
Blessings,
Marcia
I am thrilled the book is helping you! It's a tough area to contemplate, but so worthwhile to give our stories the depth our readers deserve.
DeleteAngela, I wrote this reply in the dead of night while my eyes were half-closed. I also meant to say I have all your other thesauruses/si, and am finding them invaluable during my writing journey.The appendixes in this new book are awesome guidelines in determining my h/h's arc.
DeleteOh I am so glad you are using those tools in the appendix! Sometimes I find visuals help SO MUCH with the tricky parts, which is why we always include a few. Hugs and thank you!
DeleteHi Angela,
ReplyDeleteBe kind to ourselves and others is huge. It makes me think I need to slow down the next time somebody says something hurtful. What is their wound? Are they lashing out because of it? Maybe their words and actions have nothing to do with me. It sounds like a good time to show grace.
Thanks for sharing today and I hope you have a great Christmas!
This is so true. I met someone at a work event for my husband who constantly had to tell people how smart he was, how he knew so much, and had so much more to teach beyond what we were learning from him during this meet up, etc. And I wondered why he felt so compelled to remind us constantly of how much he knew, and that he was an expert at this particular thing, how well-educated he was, etc. It was annoying too, TBH, but the writer in me wanted to know what drove this facet of his behavior. Later on in the evening he was telling us a story where he messed up during a speech he had to give, saying something he never intended to say, and how embarrassed he was but he kept going by mentioning head trauma as a joke. But the way he delivered the story, I realized it wasn't a joke, and boom, that was it, dots connected for me. At some point in the past he must have been in an accident and ended up with brain trauma, and this digs at him, makes him question his own worth and abilities. He's walking through life terrified of these moments when the aftereffects of the brain injury crop up, terrified others will not see him as capable he goes too far reminding people of his education and expertise.
DeleteAfter that, I had a lot more empathy for his behavior. So yes, we never know what another may be dealing with, and sometimes it can be hard, but we should strive for grace as much as we can. Thansk for commenting!
Moving story Angela...
DeleteIt was a good lesson for me to not judge too quickly, and practice empathy. ;)
DeleteWow! What in insightful post. The second paragraph got to me. "These wounding experiences generate fear and pain, and unresolved, will embed pieces of festering shrapnel which will eat away at a character’s esteem and self-worth. The result is a character who holds back in life, adopts dysfunctional behavior as a shield, develops skewed biases about how the world works, and internalizes destructive false beliefs about her own self-worth." This is life. Unfortunately there are people who live this out everyday. Thank you for sharing this post. It's definitely one for my keeper book.
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Cindy W.
There are many crossover points between fiction and real life, but I think the journey of growth, the path we all take to become someone stronger, better, more actualized and able to move beyond painful moments that hold us back...this is the biggest one. We all know the pain of emotional wounds, and so delivered well, this journey to heal becomes the biggest area we can create empathy bonds between readers and characters. More than that though, we have an opportunity to show readers through our character's push to overcome, that they too can do the same, even if they doubt themselves, and doubt their own strength. Our characters can be the example that we shouldn't let feat of emotional pain hold us back. I think this is the best part of the moments we share with our readers--having the opportunity to maybe impact their lives a little, supplying hope, encouragement, and making them feel like someone out there "gets it" and is like them. :)
DeleteWelcome, Angela. This post is definitely a keeper for my Seekerville notebook. When I saw on Tina's Weekend Edition last Saturday that you were visiting today, I was so excited. I wanted to thank you and Becca for your Emotion Thesaurus books, they are my constant go to resources. I can't wait for the next one!
ReplyDeleteJill, you are the sweetest--thank you for the kind words of encouragement! When we started writing these books, we had no idea if people would find them helpful or not, because they were different than anything else out there at the time. We are so glad they did end up filling a void for people--it is unbelievably satisfying to know our work will help others bring more stories to the hands of readers. <3
DeleteAngela, this is amazing. Going to work now and will print it out for a second read during my break.
ReplyDeleteALL my female characters, and most of the males, have some kind of emotional wound, from being abandoned to feeling stupid to seeing the English landlord trash their home in Ireland to childhood sexual abuse (two, one man and one woman, with a century and a half between them). They all undergo healing and all find it in Christ. This is the best fiction, and I strive for it in my writing and look for it in my reading.
Thanks,
Kathy Bailey
I am so glad you are exploring this journey of healing in your stories! It is such a powerful way we can connect to readers on a visceral level, because we all need to heal in some way. Keep at it! :)
DeleteThis is a keeper post. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Sally!
DeleteAngela, thank you for the wonderful post.
ReplyDeleteSo glad it resonated!
DeleteWelcome back, Kotter..I mean, Angela
ReplyDeleteThere are bagels and schmear ready for you and coffee is on!
Bought the book and saved the post as a PDF for my Writing Helps Folder.
This is such good stuff. THANK YOU!
What's the weather like in your part of Canada today??
Hurray, bagels! I love me some bagels. :)
DeleteWeather here is a bit odd this year--unseasonably warm! Hardly any snow where I am, either, which again is so strange. We've had a few snowfalls, but warm temps came and melted it all! I know it won't last, so I am enjoying it while I can. The way the deer are decimating the green left on my lawn, they are enjoying it too!
Thank you so much as always for having me here Tina, and so carefully shepherding my post with pictures and sharing. You guys are all so wonderful here--I really do love the community! <3
I love the word Schmear! It makes me smile every time I hear it.
DeleteVery interesting post! I actually have this book on my wishlist. Definitely looks like a great resource and I love all the information you shared. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteVery glad you found this helpful, Tammy!
DeleteHi Angela and welcome to Seekerville. Great post and very insightful. Looking at my novels, I think writing emotional wounds is my style although I've never thought of it in those terms before. Your article helps clarify and focus on what I was trying to accomplish. Thanks and enjoy today.
ReplyDeleteThat's terrific! I think a lot of things we do are unconcious, and then as time goes on, or we read something, it clicks that we do that thing, but just didn't think about it the same way. Personally I love these moments because it ends up becoming a light bulb moment as I can then study that element of writing more fully. :)
DeleteThis is such good stuff—not just for our characters but for us as well. Nice word, Ange!
ReplyDeleteThanks Becca. And thank you for being my partner in crime in all things! I learn so much from you. :)
DeleteOh my word! This post! I'm going to have to read this again and again to absorb all the significant information. Thank you, Angela, for sharing with us. Also, I want to thank you for all your works because they've helped me so much during the writing and editing process!
ReplyDeleteAw, you are the sweetest! And yes, please do read it a few times. This is such a difficult area, I almost didn't know if I should try and deliver it as a guest post, but I wanted to try. Very glad it seems to be hitting a nerve!
DeleteThis sounds like your book is just what I need.
ReplyDeleteI hope everyone is doing well'
I had a shocking moment last night at church when one of my four year olds decided to put his mouth around my arm like he was going to bite me. I said, "Don't you dare." He replied "I'm not biting I'm going to eat you up!" I burst into hysterical laughing. If I can survive the next couple of weeks. It is amazing how wound up my two boys are. Yet they can say their verses and answer all questions. but I come home exhausted just trying to keep up. This morning I am still decomposing from all that excitement.
Haha, this brings back memories. My boys are 19 & 21 now, so no more biting or saying things that are inappropriate for the place they are in, LOL.
DeleteI have to echo everyone else - this post is going straight in to my keeper file and I’ll use it this weekend to review my book before I enter it in the GH. So thank you! I have several of your previous books and this one is on my wish list. We all carry emotional wounds of some kind and being able to tap in to their pain helps bring our characters to life. I really believe that’s what writing what you know really means. Thank you again for such an excellent example of the Journey of Letting Go.
ReplyDeletePerfectly worded! Tapping into this pain is displaying recognition, and on a deep level, makes the reader feel valued, heard, and like they matter, because they feel not so alone in what they are experiencing. This is a powerful thing. I love connecting with people, and through fiction...well, we can do so much more than just "entertain" when we put our minds to it. :)
DeleteBest of luck with the GH, Laurie. I'm going to watch for your name in the finalists!
DeleteI love your books Angela. I struggle writing emotion. I feel it, but putting it into words is a different story.
ReplyDeleteI keep copy of The Emotion Thesaurus beside my laptop. Use it all the time.
I need to order this one too.
This post is a keeper. Thanks!
It can be hard to put into words, absolutely. The good thing is, the more we read and write, the easier it gets. It all sinks in over time. :)
Delete🤣🤣🤣🤣so true most of the time!!
DeleteHa. Most of the time. LOL.
DeleteHello Angela! I have the Emotion Thesaurus and use it all the time. I never thought of her outer goal as a yearning to satisfy something she's missing. I m definitely printing this post for my keeper file!
ReplyDeleteI am so glad you made this connection then! My guess is that if you go back and look at your stories, you will see the seeds there all along. The two are definitely connected in a change arc (the most common in storytelling). :)
DeleteWelcome, Angela! Good stuff here--thank you! I need to save and reread when I'm not in a rush with a million other things going on today. I have a couple of your thesauri already and this one is definitely on my radar!
ReplyDeleteYes, this isn't a light post, is it, haha! I hope it brings some clarity when the time is right. :)
DeleteGreat post, Angela! Thank you & May God bless you and all of Seekerville!
ReplyDeleteThank you, and right back at you! <3
DeleteThe emotional wound is vital, and not easy to write. You describe the arc so well. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Beth! And this is exactly right. These inner longings always have a purpose, they are rooted in some deep truth the character needs to see. Definitely a tricky area, so I am happy this post is helping a bit with understanding its role in character arc. :)
DeleteAngela, welcome back to Seekerville! You're post lays out the emotional wound and the process of overcoming it so beautifully. Thank you! We writers know we need to do this, but the thing that I loved especially about the post is the timing. The character must overcome the wound/lie before s/he can obtain the external goal. Have you ever seen anyone flip these? I'm off to ponder my books to see if I got it right.
ReplyDeleteJanet
Sorry Janet--I answered below but for some reason it didn't attach here. I was on my phone, so maybe I messed it up. Let me know if you understood my answer ;) (Below Karen Sargent)!
DeleteYesterday's post on fear and today's post on the wound that caused that fear fit perfectly! Wow, talk about timing...
ReplyDeleteJanet
I love it when posts come along just when you need them :)
DeleteAngela, this is a fabulous post! I so appreciate how you broke things down and described the needed elements of a character change journey/arc. And, I suspect we can determine our own wounds and how we have (or haven't) worked through them. And we can add that depth to our stories.
ReplyDeleteLoved this!
And I would love to be in the draw for your book!
This is so true, and one of the biggest comments we've had about our book--that people really understood themselves better as a result of reading through the material on characters. And this is good, because the closer we can tie real life to fiction, the deeper our stories go.
Delete(Because of this type of crossover, we made sure a psychologist read and vetted all our work, so it is psychology sound, BTW)
This is such a perfect description of the wound and the arc! Sharing and saving! I'd love to be in the drawing! Thank you!
ReplyDeleteVery glad it was helpful Janet!
DeleteAngela, this is such a valuable discussion/psychology lesson. You and Becca consistently challenge us writers to improve our craft and then equip us with the resources we need. The Emotional Thesaurus changed my writing, and The Emotional Wound Thesaurus is helping me go even deeper into my characters' emotions. I'm forever grateful for you and Becca and your generous hearts!
ReplyDeleteKaren, you are so kind to write this! Becca and I love knowing we are helping people. Writing aside, this is really what drives us both. But all that said, you are still the magician, and do all the heavy lifting! We just supply the brainstorming. :)
DeleteIn the change arc, the goal should be a tangible goal, something that is a symbol for what they need most (fulfilling that inner missing need). And because the lie the character believes to be true is part of their wound, to throw off their emotional shielding they must see the lie for what it is. So moving past the wound to a certain degree must take place before securing the goal. People will never fully let go of a wound in some cases--it eill always hurt, but how they view it and themselves will change, and strengthen them in a way that achieving the goal is possible and satisfying.
ReplyDeleteGreat post, Angela! Don't enter me in the drawing -- I have all the thesauri and highly recommend them. They have been a wonderful resource for me -- especially the Emotion Thesaurus (It's such help for envisioning actions so I show the character's emotion).
ReplyDeleteBest,
Nancy C
Nancy, thank you so much for those recommendations - you have no idea how much they help us find new writers and then work with them to strengthen their description. All of our books have sold as they have because of people like you referring and recommending, so thank you. :)
DeleteAngela! You’ve been a wealth of information!! Thank you for being with us!!!
ReplyDeleteI hope this was helpful, and thank you all for having me. After we wrote this book we were so ready to download all this information on wounds from our brains, so I appreciate the opportunity to do so!
DeleteAngela, thank you for the post! Merry Christmas!
ReplyDeleteMerry Christmas to you as well! :)
DeleteWow -- this is mind boggling good. Fantastic really. And the hyper-links (I think that's what they are called) super helpful. Perfect info for characters...but I'm thinking it might be emotionally helpful for regular old humans too...if we choose to follow our own arcs.
ReplyDeleteHonestly, it is helpful for us as people. Becca and I both had several epiphanies about ourselves as we researched and wrote this book. It has helped us grow in a few different ways, and I love this because I am all about growth, and understanding human connection better. :)
DeleteThank you, Angela, for your fantastic post....and amazing books. (The Emotional Thesaurus lives by my writing desk.) The Emotional Wounds Book is really helping me understand my characters. Thanks for all you do for writers! Blessings!
ReplyDeleteI am so happy to have been able to visit--thank you for having me. So glad our books are helpful to you!
DeleteA very interesting post, Angela. Thank you for this insightful information. I just recently got the Emotional Thesaurus and I find it very helpful. Please enter my name in the drawing for the Emotional Wound Thesaurus!
ReplyDeleteFingers are crossed for you, Nicki!
DeleteI am saving this post for future reference!! So good! I am dying to get this book. It's on my Amazon wish list!
ReplyDeleteLove all your books, Angela. Great resources for a writer.
Cheers,
Sue
Sue, I hope you find it very helpful as you dig deep into your characters. Thanks so much for stopping in!
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteHope it helps!
DeleteGoodness, this one is a keeper and am bookmarking it for future reference. Thank you so much!
ReplyDeleteThanks Sherrinda!
DeleteThis is great material. Thanks so much for sharing. I would love to win a copy of your book. I have the Emotion Thesaurus and this new book sounds like a great resource to have in a writer's hands.
ReplyDeleteGood luck in the draw, Bettie! :)
DeleteAngela, welcome back! I'm really late arriving today. But I wanted to make sure to thank you. While reading your post, I had a couple of great ideas for my current manuscript! Things I need to make sure to change or add. This post was perfect timing for me! :)
ReplyDeleteI love hearing that. It's always great when something comes along at just the right time--so glad this inspired some ideas!
DeleteI just bought the book and look forward to reading more!
DeleteI hope you find it really helpful--thanks so much for giving it a try!
DeleteThis really resonates with me, especially coming from such a large family - that just adds so many layers of conflict in an emotional arc because everyone perceives things differently and therefore puts their own slant on things. And if you're like me and try to see both sides to the story, this can be emotionally draining. Sometimes I feel like I'm one big emotional wound and therefore, so are my characters!
ReplyDelete